Contented Dementia

My husband has moderate age-related dementia, and possibly Alzheimer's. No Doctor has used the "A" word yet but he is on several medicines for it. I decided to get current on what to do as the memory loss and possible personality changes increase. Other books are medical in the approach and offer great advice. But this one concentrates on the well-being of the person suffering from the condition. The concept is to focus on what is left not what is lost and to keep the person in a state of pleasant thoughts to which he/she can access memories. The first action is to avoid questions. They cause the person to search their minds and often come up empty leading to frustration and a feeling of inadequacy. Phrasing things with a references such as "I was wondering about the _______, fill in the blank. Try to focus the conversation into areas which the person has experience and see where the conversation goes. My husband was in the Navy. So I started a conversation using this method. He took off and told me stories for 20 minutes. Now the benefit is he stayed in this happy frame of mind for many more hours. We went on to have dinner , watch TV, etc., and I could tell he enjoyed the whole evening. There are many tips in the book and I highly recommend it.

Borne of long hands-on experience and trial and error, Contented Dementia introduces a simple, clear model for effective communication and motivational techniques for clinicians, carers and family to use and share in helping someone with dementia retain their sense of self, dignity, control and joy. By anecdotal report, the approaches prove very effective. Oliver James' writing is crisp, direct and clear, and readers will quickly grasp the key concepts and techniques.As a professional in the field, I'd recommend this book to anyone working with people who have dementia because it introduces ways of thinking about and understanding the effects of the disease that will make for happier, richer, and less stressful interactions between anyone who has dementia and those who support them. This book gives practical advice and furnishes many examples through several case-studies. Though seemingly simple, it is based on a sophisticated understanding of the disease, its process, and the way we work as people. A brilliant help and an approach that is good now, and will hopefully keep evolving. My copy is always on loan, and I need more. Buy one for your library, and one for yourself.Howard Vickridge, New Zealand.

After I read this book, I realized that my solutions to help my sister with her dementia were so wrong. Until I read this book, I found I was asking questions of her that just caused her to be more confused. I didn't realize that it is not the long term memory that that is affected by the dementia; it is the short term memory. I highly recommend that you read this book If you have a family member, or you are a care giver to someone with dementia,You CAN HELP make their life so much more contented. This book opened my eyes. I live far away from my sister and I phone her as much as I can. We talk about happy times, the old times and I know she enjoys the call, I know that I am helping her. Please read this book.

Not finished this yet but it was exactly what I was looking for: a book with good ideas and something that doesn’t read like a journal article. Simple concept that really helps: tried it already!

If you're considering this book, you need it. After seeing several references to it in online forums, I bought it, read it in one evening, and was much impressed by the author's experience and wisdom. I gave it to someone who is dealing with an afflicted loved one, and she read it and bought two more copies for friends of hers.

I highly recommend this book for anyone providing care to individuals living with Alzheimer's. The book is designed with exercises at the end of each chapter. I am using this reference in my 12-week certificate program as an Alzheimer's coach at the Remembering4You (dot) com training institute.My favorite and hardest exercise in this book is NEVER to ask any question to an individuals with Alzheimer's. It is too confusing and requires areas of the brain that no longer function well. Instead we need to learn to state the statement behind the intended question. For example, instead of saying "Are you hungry?" we might say "I'm hungry, let's go eat".Dr. Ethelle LordPioneer in Alzheimer's Coaching

The title of this book "Contented Dementia" was the draw. Despite it its very British, and I, alas, am very Irish, I appreciated the chapter on direct questions:.. an epiphany as to why the nursing home industry has thus far failed my radiant parent who was diagnosed with severe dementia in spring 2011. Consequently, I have begun to employ the " 'round the bush" approach to motivate my confused mother to complete the fundamental tasks of daily life, as well as to initiate recreational and/or purposeful activities. Further, it has helped me as a part time caretaker to better understand the affect questions have on her state of mind and how damaging they can be.

This book is a must for anyone that has a close friend or relative that is in the early stages (and later as well) of dementia (such as due to Parkinson's or Alzheimer's). Although there are no cures, there are ways to reduce the negative impact on the diseased and the care takers. Between this book and a little research, you can improved the sufferer's life as well as your own. Unfortunately, those that care the most are probably the one's making life worse than it need be. Recommended reading. I got my copies (yes, multiple) from Amazon.

My dear old dad (then aged 90) saw this advertised and asked me to buy it. 'They say I've got dementia so I thought it would help to know about it'. How wise he was despite his condition! He couldn't concentrate enough to read it (and also forgot he's asked for it!) but I found it really useful. It helped me to see things from the perspective of the sufferer and gave me strategies to work with him not against him. My step mother (his main carer) didn't rate it highly. She wasn't able to 'go with it' and wanted to control the situation and our approaches were very different. In fact I think she resented the fact that it helped me. So not for everyone. But it made my last year or so with my dad a positive experience. He was himself to the end and this book helped me see that.

The SPECAL approach to caring for someone with dementia, described in this book, is very special indeed. Following some of the SPECAL ideas, I have just started making some relatively small changes to the way I respond to mum, and have already seen a real change in her happiness and confidence. Before, I used to see tight little smiles that hid her frustration at, for example, being corrected when she got something ‘wrong’. Now, I see genuine smiles and much more relaxed and happy mum. Not correcting the person is one of the basic ‘rules’, but there is a lot more to SPECAL than that. This book comprehensively explains it and how to use its approach to achieve exactly what it offers in its title - contentment and well-being for a loved one or client with dementia.The needs of the carer are not forgotten either, and so there is advice on carer well-being too.I highly recommend anyone caring for someone with dementia to read this.

As my mother's primary carer, very ably asissted by my sisters, this book became the lifeline to enabling us to maintain Mum's quality of life, and to see things through her eyes, as it were.It also enabled us to consider the options of Mum possibly going into full-time care, or maintaining proper care at home, Mum's preferred choice. We, thankfully, chose the latter.At first, I was slightly nervous about reading this book. Within the first few pages, no more than 10, I was avidly reading it and have, ever since, been thankful for this book.How thankful and grateful I am, indeed our whole family, that we chanced upon this book and thereby gave our mother four more years in which we adapted to her world, not requiring Mum to adapt to ours. It is written with the poignancy, depth of feeling and true understanding of the trauma that hits for six all who deal with this terrible disease.This book enabled us to find those frequent and wonderful oases in a life that had suddenly become a desert.

My husband was diagnosed with dementia just before Christmas last year at the age of 58. When I was finally able to tell everyone a friend going through the same thing recommended this book to me. It saved my sanity and put our lives back on track. The book is easy to read and the strategies recommended in it make so much sense and make a difference so quickly you wonder why they needed to be pointed out in the first instance. Three months later I am reading the book for the second time and things are even clearer now than they were before. Thank goodness for Penny Garner, Oliver James and The Contented Dementia Trust.

I was recommended this book by a friend whose mother was suffering from advanced dementia. I found the book to provide a useful model of how dementia sufferers may see the world (i.e. photographic album) and see their actual situation differently (i.e. relate sitting in a doctor's surgery to a past experience such as an airport departure lounge). It also helped me understand that my mother's dementia isn't nearly as advanced as it is in those used as case studies/examples.The book proposes a blueprint and exercises for managing dementia sufferers. Not sure about that. I suspect that these may be useful to some and not other others as everyone will be different.I can understand those who consider the book to be patronising but i found it a useful read, it certainly helped my understanding of dementia and for that reason alone was worth the money and time. I've actually purchased another two books for my sisters because i think they will get similar benefits.